Can You Make Yourself More Attractive?
Research shows that there may be a few things you can do to improve your chances of attracting the person you want most, although your results may vary.
Be Comfortable and Confident
Developing more comfort in your own body can greatly increase your dynamic attractiveness. Take a dance class, or just spend more time dancing around your living room. Join a running club or take up acting. And improve your dynamic attractiveness by using open, expansive body gestures. Similarly, when you focus on your strengths and seek out the environments where you’re most confident, you’ll feel more secure, which can translate into appearing more attractive to others.
Finding love at a bar happens less often than you think, University of California, Davis psychologist Paul Eastwick says. A better plan is to join an activity group where you’ll meet new people who share your interests. “If you keep moving through those networks, you’ll eventually get to know people you click with,” he says. “People are good at this when it comes to finding a job. Maybe it seems instrumental or creepy for dating, but I do think there is a way to leverage your network.”
Don’t Play (Too) Hard to Get
Yes, you may not want to seem easy, but you also don’t want to make it so hard to win you that a potential partner gives up. “There is old research showing that playing hard-to-get, even after initial attraction, is not a good idea,” State University of New York at Stony Brook psychologist Arthur Aron says. “The ideal is to make it feel as if it’s hard for everyone else to get you. We like challenges, but we like challenges we can win.”
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